This morning there was a brief mention on NPR about a survey
by Cupid.com that said the Southern drawl is the most attractive North American
accent. If that’s true, why do so many
of y’all make fun of those of us who have it?
Is it petty jealousy?
A realistic Southern accent isn’t as easy to mimic as it
might seem. I’ve cringed at TV actors
hired more for their looks than acting ability that tried to do it and failed. I doubt some of them have ever even been to
the South.
As the product of a “mixed marriage”—one Southern parent and
one Midwestern—I was aware of regional accents from an early age. Dad was the only one from his side of the
family to wander below the Mason-Dixon Line.
The rest stayed in the Midwest or went out West. I could
 |
| Sexy, southern, and supernaturel. Bill Compton and Sookie Stackhouse from HBO series True Blood. |
expect some teasing at family
gatherings. But I learned how to handle
it with grace by watching how my mother dealt with it.
When I was 10, my family vacationed near St. Louis. We stayed at a campground that had a
pool. There was a slide and I remember a
teenage girl, about 7 or 8 years older than I was, in line on the ladder behind
me. She pinched and tormented me
mercilessly because she liked
 |
| Thanks to the 1980s hit series Dukes of Hazard, shorts made from cut off jeans are known as "Daisy Dukes." |
hearing me say, “Quit!” which came out sounding
like “Qweeeyut!” In retrospect, I should
have kicked her in the face. I was
positioned for it. But, she correctly
assumed I was too much of a Southern gentleman to do a thing like that. And for all I knew she had an army of other
teenage girls from Illinois ready to do some kind of aquatic Civil War re-enactment on me at the swimming
pool.
My first year after college, I lived in Tampa, which is only
Southern geographically, not culturally.
All those transplanted Yankees teased me, too, but without the pinching. It was there that I was surprised to hear
five words linked together in a way I never expected.
“Your Southern accent is sexy.”
Of course I just laughed because I assumed it was a
joke. It wasn’t. I heard it again when I lived in Kansas City,
MO. There was also quite a bit of
teasing—some of it friendly, some of it downright hateful.
 |
| Ellie May Clampit of the 1960s TV series The Beverly Hillbillies proved hillbillies can be sexy if they have all their teeth. |
I’ll admit that, at times, I’ve consciously (and more often subconsciously)
altered the degree of my drawl depending on the circumstances. When I need to sound smart, I cram Dixie in a
box. When I need to be charming, I trot
out the magnolia and mint julep until I sound like one of Scarlet’s suitors in
Gone with the Wind.
Northerners eat it up.
The farther from the South they’re from, the more susceptible they are
to it. Sure, they may tease and mock you
for it, but they’ll do that while bending over backward to
 |
| Rhett Butler and Scarlet O'Hara from Gone with the Wind. |
do what you
ask. Just be sure to sprinkle in plenty of
phrases like, “if you don’t mind,” “I’d appreciate it an awful lot,” and “you’re
so kind.”
So, let ‘em make fun of us.
It’s only the conscious part of their brains trying to protest while the
subconscious part is being spellbound by the combination of Southern charm and
words they have to work a little harder to understand.
Get updates on new posts--become a follower.
Do you like snarky Southern humor? Order Jim's book,
The Newcomers Field Guide to Hill Folk.
Get updates on new posts--become a follower.
The Newcomers Field Guide to Hill Folk.
